


born with a broken heart

by IntrovertedOwl



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Gen, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, Hurt Tony Stark, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Tony Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Has Issues, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-14
Updated: 2017-11-14
Packaged: 2019-02-02 11:10:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12725499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IntrovertedOwl/pseuds/IntrovertedOwl
Summary: Just a short piece about Tony's relationship with his dad.Not researched or anything, so the ages might not line up with movie/comic canon.





	born with a broken heart

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sure this has been done before, but I had Tony feels and this came out.

 

Tony was four when he started messing around with semiconductors and electronic circuits. By the age of five, he’d built his first robot. It wasn’t much, just a photo-detecting box on wheels; still it was the first time he’d built something from scratch, maybe if he showed it to his father, he would be allowed to help him in the lab. After all, till now he had been too young to be of any use. If he could only prove that he wasn’t stupid…

 

Except when he went in, Howard was poring over one of his own inventions, too busy, as always, to so much as look at him. Tony stood in the corner, waiting, just as he’d been taught, because he did not want to interrupt something important. Last time he had done something like that, father had been very angry.

 

But he was itching to share his achievement. Jarvis had already seen it, and he’d been very impressed. He’d said Tony was the smartest five year old he’d ever met. Surely that meant father would be pleased too?

 

When Howard finally turned around and saw him standing there, he barked at him, “What is it now?”

 

Tony hesitantly presented his bot to him, showed him what it could do.

 

Howard sighed, rubbing his eyes. “Christ, Tony, I told you, you’re not supposed to come here unless it’s something important. Anyone could do that, that’s basic robotics. _Only – something – important._ Got it?”

 

Tony blinked. “Okay. Sorry,” he mumbled, collecting his things and moving out quickly, before Howard could see the tears that were rapidly forming – that was another thing Howard disliked. Tears. He didn’t have  patience for things – weaknesses - like that.

 

Jarvis consoled him as best as he could. But really, how much could he make up for the hurt caused by a father who didn’t seem to care?

 

 

 

By the age of seven, Tony had realized that it didn’t matter what things he made, his father would want more. That should have made him angry, but it just made him try harder.

 

By the time he was eight, Howard seemed to have at least noticed that he wasn’t a complete idiot, because he was allowed to enter his lab and occasionally “help out” – which meant standing around, handing him tools and taking them back, as and when required. Occasionally Howard would forget it was him there and hand him something sharp, or hot, and he’d hurt himself. Tony didn’t complain, partly because his father would not appreciate it, partly because he didn’t want to stop coming. He barely got to see his father outside the lab, after all.

 

 

 

When he was ten, he realized that all those expeditions his father went on, were for Captain America – Steve Rogers. He’d heard the stories, of course. The few times Howard had joined the family for dinner, he’d get drunk soon enough, and start talking about “the good old days” with his “good friend” Steve Rogers and James “Bucky” Barnes and all their adventures.

 

But it hurt that the reason his father never seemed to have time for him, was because he was searching for a man who’d been missing for decades – and was likely dead.

 

 

 

And when he was eleven, he realized he’d always, _always_ , be “not good enough” for his father, because of Steve “perfect” Rogers. That day, he took off all his Captain America posters. Jarvis found them and all his Captain America merchandise in the bin the next day.

 

 

He’d pretend he didn’t care about his father’s opinions from that time on, but _oh_ he _did_ , so much, and he hated it. But he continued anyway. He got into MIT at fifteen, which he thought had finally made a difference, because Howard finally talked to him, on his own – but it was for a press conference.

 

 

That was his first proper brush with the media. _The genius war hero’s genius “heartthrob” son._ That was also when he first realized there were other ways of getting his dad’s attention.

 

 

 

And so, at fifteen, being a rich, famous, genius surrounded by older kids, he went in to a life of parties and drinks and “friends” who hung out with him because he was rich and powerful. The press loved it, Howard hated it, and Tony wasn’t exactly sure what he was doing. Of all the things that happened in college – including his multiple degrees – the only thing he was truly grateful for was meeting Rhodey.

 

 

 

 

Still, it did work since Howard finally seemed to notice his existence, if only to yell at him for “wasting his potential”. He still remembered that day in December, when his nineteen year old self had gone home for the holidays. He’d had yet another fight with Howard. Not a new thing in the Stark household, especially after Jarvis’ death two years back – that had hit him hard, leading to possibly their biggest argument, they’d both been down several drinks and Tony had blurted out that Jarvis had been _“more of a father”_ to him than Howard had ever been, for a second he’d been afraid he’d crossed the line and Howard might actually strike back, but after a while he’d simply walked out, and it had been months since they’d talked to each other again. Maria had generally been able to calm them down with Jarvis’ help. Her reproach was about the only thing that could make Tony talk to Howard in a not-aggressive manner these days.

 

 

 

But yet, that day, she had failed too. He’d refused to back down, and Howard didn’t want to waste time on him. He didn’t turn back as they left, and the next thing he heard about them was from Obadiah Stane, telling him they had died in an accident.

 

 

 

He’d play those last moments again and again over the years, wondering what he could have done differently, and if it would even have made a difference. After all, one last exchange wouldn’t have undone years of misunderstandings and dislike.

 

 _Stane, Afghanistan, Iron Man…_ Would these things still happen?

 

He was forty one when he saw the video, Howard Stark reaching out from the grave with a message that would save his life, and maybe soothe a little bit of the hurt. He was forty seven when he found out the truth about his parents’ death.

 

Each betrayal stung worse than the previous one, and he sat and pondered at the irony of Howard Stark, spending a huge part of his life looking for two men, only to be killed by one of them, and his son to fight the other.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Note - I don't hate Bucky or anything, so no hate pls.
> 
>  
> 
> ~ I'm teamtonystarkneedsahug on tumblr ~


End file.
